Dorothy Hookey thought she had everything in place.
The 86-year-old had enrolled her husband Graham into cooking classes to make sure he could look after himself when she was gone. She had emptied the house of useless objects for the local op shop to benefit. And she had obtained her "insurance" – a lethal drug that could gently take her breath away when the time was right.
The long-time member of pro-euthanasia group Exit International also knew that when she decided to take her last dose of medicine, she had to be alone.
As much as she might have wanted the familiar embrace of her husband as she died, getting him involved would only put him at risk of being charged with aiding or abetting a suicide – an offence that carries a maximum penalty of five years' jail.
So when years of intolerable arthritic pain finally took its toll last year, putting her at imminent risk of being hospitalised until the end, Mrs Hookey secretly implemented her final exit strategy.
After saying goodnight to Mr Hookey and two of her four adult children who were staying with them on November 26, Mrs Hookey sat up in her bed and swallowed her fatal drug. It was accompanied by a nip of her favourite wine, which helped her to go to sleep every night.
"I got up about 3am and realised her bedroom light was still on," said Mr Hookey. "She was sitting up in bed with a book and I thought she was asleep but when I rubbed her hand, I realised she was cold."
Fearing she had had a heart attack, Mr Hookey, 85, called an ambulance and woke up his adult children who were instructed to perform CPR until paramedics arrived. It was useless. She was gone.
The next day, Mr Hookey said he realised there was a suicide note tucked into the corner of her bedside table. After telling the undertaker, the police jumped on it.
"Within minutes, there were about six policemen and three detectives roaring through the house," he said. "There were forensics, they were photographing and taking things in little bags and they got statements from me and my other two children."
Ever since, Mr Hookey and his family have been subjected to an increasingly alarming police investigation, and they now fear they may be caught up in the controversy surrounding Philip Nitschke – the founder of Exit International who is being investigated by police and health authorities for helping several people take their lives.
Mr Hookey said after a police search of his home on the day after his wife's death, more police returned earlier this month to execute a warrant with the words "assist suicide" on it. They took the family's computer and Ipad, and tried to find any books that Mrs Hookey might have used to plan her death.
"It's such a kick in the guts. I've been waiting for for the sword of Damocles to fall ever since," he said, even though he feels he has done nothing wrong.
Mr Hookey said it hurt to be treated like a criminal while he was mourning his wife's death – an end he described as a rational choice made by an independent woman who did not want to die in a hospital or nursing home with no control over what happened to her.
"To me, it's just such a shocking waste of police resources," said Mr Hookey, who is a Justice of the Peace and son of a policeman.
The treasurer of his local Probus club is also angry that his wife felt that she had to be alone when she died, and that even making the sacrifice of dying alone had not protected her family from scrutiny.
"If she had of been able to get in the car and drive somewhere to do it, I don't think this would have happened. But because we were in the house, we're now suspects," he said. "I find that tragic … and I think it is a dreadful indictment on our social system."
A spokeswoman for Victoria Police would not comment on whether charges would be laid, but said detectives were preparing a report for the coroner.
Anyone needing support can contact Lifeline on 13 11 14, MensLine on 1300 789 978 or Arthritis and Osteoporosis Victoria Help Line on 1800 263 265.
